Perhaps painful disappointments in the relationship with the other.
Perhaps after repeated failed experiences and noisy groans.
Perhaps because we fear failure and we derive from it our judgments, our internal and external responses.
We always weave wires around our hearts
And we may put barriers between us and the other to ensure that this beautiful relationship remains full of pretence and artificiality.
And it may be so as long as everything happens on the surface only, because on the surface, no one can reach our dark areas ...
Perhaps no one can reach our black box on which all our failures and difficult moments in the depth of our spaces that we have not traveled and wandered in for years and we have not even allowed ourselves to sail and enjoy, the existing wisdom have been recorded and will not be allowed to manifest in us.
Perhaps ... no one sees our wounds still open behind closed doors.
Perhaps the other is a great opportunity to explore our internal terrain and governance fountains as soon as they are allowed to open.
Perhaps he will take us, if we allow him, to places we did not know existed in the first place
Or maybe we knew that it was, but perhaps we never thought of putting our hand on the locks of its gates
Perhaps because we are terrified of what we might find behind those gates. Perhaps the other will lead us to the most fragile areas of us
Perhaps we are afraid of confrontation that we do not trade or we are almost thinking about even with ourselves.
Perhaps letting this require a lot of strength, a lot of delivery and a lot of effort to dismantle those crippling rooms toward living freedom.
By Amina Lourdjane